Read your Bible.

I saw a guy reading his Bible today. "That is wonderful," you might say. And it might have been, except we were both doing 65 MPH down the interstate! (Yes Jimmy, I was doing the speed limit.) Now tell me, am I wrong, isn't there a time and place to read your Bible? I mean you could be reading about Heaven, hit a bridge and be in Heaven all at the same time. Really, if you have to read your Bible while you are driving, are you THAT busy or should you consider taking a time management class? Don't get me wrong, we should all read our Bibles, but while we are driving? What do you think, does doing something good, like reading your Bible, out weigh the doing something wrong, like reading your Bible while driving?
Just wondering,
Joe B

Read your Bible.

REMEMBER,

JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE,

FROM THE IDIOT AND HIS FAMILY

Christmas memories anyone?

What is your oldest Christmas memory? What I mean is, can you remember back to your fourth or fifth Christmas? I was thinking the other day about some of my Christmas childhood memories. One of my favorites was every year the local fire house would open their doors to all the neighborhood kids. They would have Santa, some sort of Christmas movie, drawings for gifts. (I remember winning a box of chocolate covered cherries one time.) It was a pretty neat little affair. I also remember that while me and my brother were at the firehouse, my mom and grandmother and a few other people would be at home making homemade sugar and chocolate-chip cookies. The only thing I did not like about it was my mom would not let us eat any of them. They always had to count every cookie! Which didn't make much sense to me. After all the cooking and counting was finished, THEN we could have a few cookies.

I remember watching Charlie Brown's Christmas, The Grinch who Stole Christmas, Rudolph,
The Little Drummer Boy (my favorite), and Frosty the Snowman. That was pretty much it. No computer generated cartoons. Just the classics. Of course they weren't classics back then.

I remember have a birthday cake with a santa and some reindeer on it. My birth day is Dec. 24.

I remember my mom and dad building a Christmas village under the Christmas tree. It came with everything from a train to houses with lights to a blue mirror that looked like a lake.

I remember me and my brother going up to our room and not being able to sleep. But then, I remember me and him waking up at 4 and trying to wake up our parents, who would promptly tell us to go back to bed and not go down stairs. (I ALWAYS went downstairs and came back up and told my brother what I saw under the tree.) Then we would get up at 5 and do it all over again. Then we would get up at six and try one more time. We wouldn't get up at 7 because mom and dad had tied us to the bed. No wait they never did that. (That's what I do with my kids!) Growing up we didn't have much money but I do remember my parents always made sure we had a great Christmas!

I hope that I do as good a job as my parents did when I was growing up and give my sons wonderful memories like the ones I have. Now it's your turn. Any Christmas memories you would like to share? I would love to hear them.

God bless and Merry Christmas,
Joe B

Christmas memories anyone?

"That there is an RV...don't be falling it love with it, we are taking it with us when we leave here next month."

Can you tell I love the Christmas season. Not just because it is the celebration of the birth of my Savior, but all the aspects of it. I love the food (MMMMMM FOOOOOD), I love spending time with friends and family, I love the time off of work (OH YES I DO!), and there is so much more. But the one thing I really look forward to are the movies. I have a list of my favorite Christmas movies. Here are my top nine or ten.

Can you tell me what movie the quote from my title comes from? you Guessed it my number one pick of all time favorite Christmas movies.

NUMBER 1, drum role please...dadadadadadadadadadada

NATIONAL LAMPOON'S CHRISTMAS VACATION

Man you got to love Eddie.

Eddie shows up un expected
Eddie - "Are you surprised Clark?
Clark, "I couldn't be more surprised if I woke up tomorrow with my face sewn to the carpet."


Here are some more of my favorites.

2. Home Alone - "Are you ready to give up or are you thirsty for more?"

3. The Santa Clause - Santa talking to Judy the elf, while drinking her coco. Santa, "You look pretty good for someone your age." Judy, "I'm sorry I am seeing someone in wrapping.

4. Scrooged - Ghost of Christmas Present keeps hitting Bill Murray. He finally has all he can stand. He tells her, "If you touch me again, I'll rip your wings off."

5. A Christmas Story - The dad gets a package with fragile wrote on the side. His comment, "Frageelee, that must be Italian."

6. A Charlie Brown Christmas

7. How The Grinch Stole Christmas - Jim Carey

8. Miracle on 34th street.

9. It's a Wonderful Life

10. A Polar Express

Did I miss any? Are they in the right order? What do you think? Let me know and as aways, Have a Very Merry christmas.

Joe B

"That there is an RV...don't be falling it love with it, we are taking it with us when we leave here next month."

Christmas Safety Bulletin #53.

Make sure your real Christmas tree gets plenty of water.

I ask my son every night if he has made sure there is water for the Christmas tree. He assures me there is plenty of water. So when I saw this picture I just cracked up. Hope you like it.

God bless and Merry Cristmas!

Joe

Christmas Safety Bulletin #53.

Check your Christmas IQ!

Here we go, lets see how many of these question you can answer correctly. One thing, all your answers have to be backed up by the Bible. Tell me how many you got right. I am going to post the answers in the comment section. Good luck!

1. For the journey to Bethlehem, Mary & Joseph...
a) walked.
b) Joseph walked; Mary rode a donkey.
c) rode a bus.
d) Who knows?

2. When Mary became pregnant, Mary & Joseph were...
a) married.
b) just friends.
c) engaged.
d) none of the above.

3. When Mary became pregnant...
a) Joseph married her
b) Joseph wanted to dissolve their relationship.
c) Mary left Nazareth for a while.
d) both b & c.

4. Christmas has always been observed...
a) on December 25th.
b) on January 17th
c) at Grandma's house.
d) none of the above.

5. How many wise men came to see Jesus?_____

6. Who directed Mary & Joseph to go to Bethlehem?
a) Herod
b) an angel
c) Caesar
d) the IRS

7. Just what is a heavenly host?
a) an angelic choir
b) the welcoming angel in heaven
c) an army of angels
d) none of the above

8. How many angels spoke to the shepherds?
a) a multitude
b) two - Gabriel and Michael
c) one
d) Who knows?

9. What song did the angels sing?
a) "O Little Town of Bethlehem"
b) "Joy to the World"
c) "Glory to God in the Highest"
d) none of the above

10. Baby Jesus was born in a...
a) cave
b) manger
c) barn
d) Who knows?

11. Joseph's family was from...
a) Jerusalem
b) Nazareth
c) Bethlehem
d) none of the above

12. What animals where present at Jesus' birth?
a) cows, sheep, and camels
b) cows, sheep, and donkeys
c) lions and tigers and bears (oh my)
d) Who knows?

13. What is a manger anyway?
a) a barn
b) a place for hay
c) a feeding trough
d) a Bible term for the church nursery

14. When did baby Jesus cry?
a) when He opened the wise men's gifts
b) whenever babies usually cry
c) when the cattle started lowing
d) "no crying he makes"

15. Who saw the star over Bethlehem?
a)Mary & Joseph
b) shepherds
c) three kings
d) none of the above

16. What in the world are Magi?
a) Eastern Kings
b) bankers
c) astrologers
d) school teachers

17. When the wise men brought their gifts to Jesus, they found Him in...
a) a manger
b) a house
c) Vacation Bible School
d) none of the above

18. What sign were the shepherds looking for?
a) a star over the stable
b) a barn outlined with Christmas lights
c) a baby in a manger
d) both a & c

19. What did the innkeeper say to Mary & Joseph?
a) "I have a stable out back."
b) "Come back after the holidays."
c) "There's no room in the inn."
d) none of the above

20. In what books of the Bible will you find these fascinating facts?
a) Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John
b) Matthew and Luke
c) Mark and Matthew
Matthew, Mark, and Luke

Scoring:

19 - 20 correct - Congratulations! You can separate fact from fiction.

18 - 16 correct - Not bad! Truth wins over tradition.

15 - 11 correct - Uh oh! You've been to too many Christmas plays.

10 or below correct - Ouch!

I hope you had fun and maybe learned a thing or two.

God bless and Merry Christmas,

Joe B

Check your Christmas IQ!

Who started Christmas?

With all the stuff going around where people are trying to keep Christ out of Christmas, I thought this is a relevant story.

Who Started Christmas?

Author Unknown

A woman was Christmas shopping with her two children. After many hours of walking down row after row of toys and after hours of hearing both her children asking for everything they saw on those many shelves, she finally made it to the store elevator with her two children in hand. She was feeling what so many of us feel during the holiday season time of the year, getting that perfect gift for every single person on our shopping list, overwhelming pressure to go to every party, every house warming, taste all the holiday food and treats, making sure we don't forget anyone on our card list, and the pressure of making sure we respond to everyone who sent us a card. Finally the elevator doors opened revealing a crowd in the car. She pushed her way in and dragged her two kids and all her bags of stuff in with her . As the doors closed she couldn't take it anymore and blurted out. "Whoever started this whole Christmas thing should be found, strung up, and shot. From the back of the car, a quiet calm voice responded, "Don't worry, we've already crucified Him."

The rest of the trip down was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.

Don't forget this year to keep the One who started this whole Christmas thing in your every thought, deed, purchase, and word. If we all would, just think how much better this world would be.

Jesus IS The Reason For The Season!

I hope you enjoyed the story.

God bless, Joe

Who started Christmas?

Oldie but a goodie.

Winter hasn't even been here a month and I hate it already. I miss going to play golf with my buddies from church. So here is a little golf joke to get us through till spring. Actually it is going to take more than a little joke to get me through but I thought it was a good start.

Two golfing friends were about to tee off, when one fellow noticed
that his partner had but one golf ball.

"Don't you have at least one other ball?", he asked.

"Nope, I only need one ball."

"Are you sure? What happens if you lose that one?"

"This is a very special golf ball. You can't lose it, so I don't need
another one."

"What do you mean you can't lose it! What happens if you slice your
shot and the ball goes in the lake?"

"That's okay, this special golf ball senses when it's under water and
it puts out a steam of bubbles. I'll be able to retrieve it. You can't
lose this ball"

"Well what happens if you hit it into the long rough?"


"No problem, you see, this ball can detect the long grass and it sends
up puffs of fluorescent smoke. I'll be able to see it easily. You
can't lose this ball"

Exasperated, the friend asks, "Okay. Let's say our game goes late, the
sun goes down, and you hit your ball deep into the trees and it gets
lost among the bushes and shrubs?. What are you going to do then?"

"That's okay too. You see, this special ball can sense the darkness
and it makes a beeping sound. I'll be able to get it back - no
problem."

Finally satisfied that he needs only the one amazing golf ball, the
friend asks, "Hey, where did you get a golf ball like that anyway?"

"I found it."

If you have read this before, I hope it brought a smile to your face once again. If you haven't read this before, I hope you liked it.

God bless, Joe

Oldie but a goodie.